Being Hard Core

Retrieved from Sunday River's facebook page

There's been a lot of posts about advocating lately, whether for yourself, or triggered because of other people or the media.  While my friend and I were enjoying ourselves in this crowd of people after amazing skiing, we encountered a potential advocacy moment.  Except that it kept right on going.  We were sitting there in one of our favorite spots (between two tiki bars and able to people watch).  All of a sudden I hear "woah, you're hard core" while one of the guys nears us points to my pump.  This was not meant as an extreme form of diabetes or the bad kind or any other misconceptions we all get.  This was meant as "you have diabetes and you're drinking just like the rest of us."  And it felt good.  And it felt even better to say, "yeah, she is too."  We talked for a few minutes about diabetes, and the guys explained that they were on a ski patrol, so they knew all about it.  (I'm not sure what all includes, but I didn't encounter any misconceptions.)

It Started as Just a Cute Story

Yesterday was a crazy day.  

After dropping Girl Genius off at school, I was over 370.  An hour later after finishing #sweatbetes at the gym, I was 70.  Then 50s.  Then 30s.  Then 50s.  Then 80s.  Then 200s.

This is Coffee

I wasn't a happy camper.  Except that I was because it was sunny and warm and I get to go skiing at my favorite of all weekends up at Sunday River this weekend.  I would try to talk with Girl Genius and the words coming out of my mouth made no sense whatsoever.  We needed to go to the dry cleaners, and Starbucks is right across the street.  I wanted something, but I'm limiting myself to one cup of coffee per day during Lent, and I knew what I was going to order walking in.  And what did I order?  My usual coffee.  And as we're driving back, Girl Genius is talking about how Coffee makes his own coffee if we're not at the house.  When we're at the dry cleaners, or school, or the grocery store, or this, or that, I just zoned.  It can be mentally challenging to follow the logic of a really smart 4 year old!  And then I hear 

"juice. Because he has diabetes too.  And sometimes he goes low.  And he wears an insulin pump like you.  But when he doesn't have his insulin pump on, he takes shots until we can get to the store to get him another one."

Seriously child?!  I mean, you know I take juice if I'm low.  And you know that when we eat snack or lunch I push buttons on the pump.  But you put all that together for the dog?!  And I know that imaginative play is a way for children to help themselves understand something really complicated.  So not only is she asking questions, noticing my diabetes, paying attention when I talk to her, but she is actively trying to understand it.  

And then I'm thinking about it.  And I relate diabetes to a foreign language.  I took Spanish & French in junior high, German in high school and American Sign Language in college.  And I know very little of any of these.  Why?  Because I don't use them on a regular basis.  Diabetes for nonPWDs must be the same thing.  You hear us get angry, frustrated, and flabbergasted trying to explain diabetes.  But I don't remember or understand things I don't use a lot.  So why would people who don't experience it a lot understand it?  When it comes to explaining diabetes, I am really patient with Girl Genius, because, ya know, she's four.  But maybe that's just how it needs to be done.  Answer people's questions as they have them, not when we want them to know.  Let's all find a new friend who doesn't know much about diabetes and through the course of getting to know them better, they'll know diabetes better, and they'll be able to correct that third person, and so on.  Baby steps.  I'm taking baby steps.  Who's with me?

"My Blood Sugar Must be Low"

As you will come to learn in the next few months, I LOVE to ski.  My "tagline" is that I've been skiing longer than I've had diabetes.  (By just a few months, but nonetheless, it is still true.)  In real people world, I'm also one of the shyest people you will ever meet.  That is why I joined the Boston Ski & Sports Club last spring so I could meet people.  I've played tennis and kickball with them, but now it's winter, and ski time.  So I joined the adult team racers (ATR).  It starts in January and I cannot wait.  On Tuesday night we had our get to know you/learn everything you need to know dinner.  As we were all mingling, a few of us were talking about how we were pretty hungry.  The girl I was talking to all of a sudden said, "my blood sugar must be low."  I needed a Twix moment so that I could pull up Kelly's Blog and respond.  But as I was trying to respond these thoughts kept running through my mind.
If I make a smartass comment, what if she actually does have diabetes too?  She never actually mentioned diabetes.  Her description is actually kinda sorta accurate.  She has no idea that I have diabetes either.  I ended up saying nothing, and went on through the rest of the night, but this has definitely been kicking around in my brain.

December 9: Holly Jolly Christmas

And who doesn't love clay-mation?!

Mom Genius

From September 21, 2010

Yesterday was quite possibly one of the best diabetes days I've had in a long time (minus the shitfaced low after picking up Boy Genius from school).  It wasn't however, one of the best work days.  At the end of the day, I was waiting to talk to Mom Genius before she took Boy & Girl Genius out to dinner with the neighbors.   This neighbor dad all of a sudden looked at me and said, "Is that an insulin pump?"  It was a moment of "Crap, I've been noticed."  There are a lot of times where I am ready to stand up and fight for diabetes like you wouldn't believe.  It's something that gets my blood going.  Last night, getting ready to leave work was not one of those times.  He was asking me a lot of questions/misconceptions because his mother-in-law is sick of taking shots during the day.  He was not being rude, he was just trying to gather information, and I was trying to explain it in the briefest way possible and I explained about how meters are not as accurate as one would think (hoping Mom Genius catches on and tries to do something about it).  From here I talked about how for so long I didn't want a pump, but now that I've had one for 9 years, I love it, how I still have to carry around a meter, tabs and a pen or needles & bottle, and Mom Genius just said, "She's amazing."  This is Mom Genius!  This is my boss.  This is the smartest woman I've ever met.  This is my connection to the future, and she thinks I'm amazing because of/for my diabetes!